NO! Not yet..

If I categorize life it would be in 3 stages — childhood, teenage and adulthood. I will be finally saying a goodbye to my adolescence very soon but before that, my teenager-self wants to convey this message to the future me. Here it goes :
Dear future me,

           You never know you may find yourself all defeated, at lowest of the low. You may find yourself giving up. Before you do, let me remind you that you just cannot abandon me by giving up yet. Because, it’s not only about you but us. It has been about you and me and it has to be the same way, whether snorting in laughing or crying in the shower. You endured agony, you shed tears in distress, you craved for someone’s nearness, you craved for care, for some affection and most importantly for someone’s time. Your hankerings weren’t satisfied although, you contrived to be happy. You contrived to survive. You survived when I called you a loser, ugly and you even survived being juxtaposed throughout all your adolescent life. 

          All I can say is sorry. I am contrite! Sorry for not believing in you, for scorning you, for uttering such words which I wouldn’t even have addressed my worst enemy as. Lastly, I am sorry for not loving you.

          Since I believe in you and love you now, I can only request you to do one thing : don’t abandon me by giving up!

Negative self talk is the most common teenage problem which exerts bad influence on mental health. Let go the victim mentality and set yourself free. Be aware of your inner critic.